Ups and Downs

December 7, 2010

So the few people I’ve talked to at home recently are probably telling you guys that I’m about ready to hang myself from the nearest mango tree…which is a viable option, but won’t happen…don’t worry.  So projects…yeah not really.  The Palm Oil women have not wanted to meet…I’ve gone to the chair woman 4 times in the last 3 weeks…I have to tell you that I’m about done trying; honestly I don’t give a crap about palm oil and I really don’t wanna work with the group…the chairwoman chops money and no one really cares about the group.  I’ve decided why keep trying to motivate people when I don’t really want to in the first place…I don’t have to work with this group…the last volunteer did, but that doesn’t mean I have to.  So I’m gonna make one last effort to talk to a few of the other members tomorrow or Thursday and say (through an interpreter of course), “Ladies, let’s talk for real. Do you really want this palm oil group?  I could care less; this is for you, not me.  I walk by your houses and see you all cracking nuts on your own…do you really wanna organize a group or just keep cracking on your own.  It’s up to you.”  I don’t wanna let any of the women down, but it seems to me they don’t give a crap about the group and are only in it because now there’s another white chick in town, but they still don’t wanna meet.  In my mind I would think that they’d be like, “Hell yeah, we got someone back here to re-organize us, let’s get our group going again.” And that they’d seek me out…nope!  No one seeks me out. I’m running around this village begging people to let me help them????  But not bringing money...oh, yeah, ok, that’s why no one’s getting excited….fo’ real.

Tourism team…we should have a meeting tomorrow night.  We are supposed to have the TMT meeting on the first Wednesday of each month, which would have been last week.  Normally I go to the chairman and say, “Hey are we having our meeting tomorrow???”  But I decided not to this month because it’s quite obvious to me that no one cares, so I said nothing.  And nothing happened.  The next day the TMT secretary found me and said we should have had a meeting yesterday and that I should make sure we have one soon because he knows that I have planned meetings/activities for the group.  So I say to Fo Nicho, our chairman, “Hey, George wants us to have our TMT meeting.”  “Oh yes, next Wednesday in the evening. We missed it yesterday.”  “Uh, huh.  Hey Fo Nicho, did you talk to the signboard people to see how much they cost? You know, like you said you would at our last meeting?” (which was on November 3)…the answer was no…in case you were wondering. 

So here in lies a large source of my frustration in Ghana (and it’s not mine alone, I know for sure) people make committees, they hold meetings…especially when the white girl nags them…we go through the exercises, careful to make sure that they come up with ideas and not me alone, and then we set goals/make plans based on those ideas, everyone feels real good about it…but, here’s the key, NO ONE DOES A FLIPPING THING TO REACH THOSE GOALS!!!!! NADA!

Why??  This is my question.  Why am I here?  We’re not working on anything.  Besides Thursdays (water sachet women) I have to find reasons to go into the village; really!  I go in, buy bread, stop at Esther’s or Naomi’s to talk for a while (mostly I just sit because my language skill does not allow me to carry on a conversation…this also sucks hard.  And the thing is…I can’t teach myself a language I don’t know…Sekua is not on Rosetta Stone), and so after sitting around I hobble back up to my house and do something until I feel guilty enough again to wobble back to town.  I dunno.  I’m trying to be creative about starting things, but when there is no interest….

Mawuli still needs to talk to the people about the orphans…he’s waiting for a town meeting or something, I dunno. Confidence came to me the other day and suggested we start teaching the youth how to make batik and tye & dye.  She learned how to do all this at trade school.  Sounds like a great idea. We’ll need about 350 cedis to get started (if the youth is interested) and then we will teach the kids the skill and sell the fabric to hopefully make a profit that we can then reinvest back into the business until we make enough money to start giving scholarships to kids for school fees or for them to start their own venture…that is the very big picture in the long run.  Of course, “you could get the money from an NGO” put a very sour taste in my mouth. But alas I am bored and want to do something….is that bad???  I’m thinking that I will suggest she get 150 cedis (her family has some money) and I’ll get the other 200 (I’ll just use my own) and then we’ll start the business and pay ourselves back once it’s turning a profit.  If we don’t turn a profit, then we lose our money…that’s business, do you believe in this enough?  We’ll see how that goes.  She is supposed to talk to the youth this Sunday after church, but I want to go over a few things before she talks to them.

I also want to use the Water Sachet Group as a role model…let me tell you the story and at the end you’ll see my role model lecture…

Next week we will have a meeting at the Water Sachet Group (WSG) announcing that we will start paying the women per purse they make.  Up until now (Aki started meeting with them in January I think) the women have been working and the money earned paid for 2 machines and supplies.  Now that you awesome US people bought a bunch of purses, we have enough money saved that we can start paying out to the women.  So now we will pay them per purse…but only for good purses, so Aki and I are quality control, we will keep track of each good purse made per woman and then pay out at the end of the month.  The catch is, we won’t be able to work every Thursday and pay out because we have to sell them as fast as we make them or we’ll have no money in the group.  So I think this will be a sore spot for the ladies… BUT on the Thursdays we don’t sew purses I want the bad sewers to come in and practice so that they get better and we will start introducing new products to the good sewers so we can start diversifying our products and seeing different places we can sell them. Since we have some money saved we can use it (small, small) to develop prototypes.  So that’s that.  We’ll see how it pans out next Thursday.  We will also get a local seamstress to come over on some days and give tutorials on the machine, etc.

So here is the role model speech; I’m gonna give it to the WSG and also preach it to TMT and Confidence (and POW if they miraculously reinvent themselves)…something like this…

“Do you see what you have done?  You worked hard as a group for almost 12 months, and now you will start seeing the money come.  You did not say “give me” to anyone. You did not ask an NGO for money or ask anyone else.  You did it on your own!  This should show you that you can make money and a good life for your self…on your own…it takes hard work and time, but it will come.  This group is a role model to the whole community…I will tell them what you have done, and you should tell them what you have done.  You should be very proud of yourselves.  It’s much harder to earn your own way than it is to ask for something; but you are more likely to succeed when you earn it yourself.”  Or a lil’ somethin’, somethin’ like that.

Anyway. So today Mawuli built (because I wasn’t allowed to help much…I tried) me a bamboo table for my kitchen.  I needed more storage/work space.  In return, I made him banku and groundnut soup.  We are both very happy.  I’m still waiting on someone to show me where the good soil is so I can start growing my herbs…I’m tempted to just go in someone’s farm and take some…I don’t think they’re gonna miss it, I don’t need much and I’m tired of waiting on it.

I’ve also decided to go to the headmaster this week and talk to him about the books I’ve heard about that have been sitting in boxes for over year…because we don’t have a library.  I’m going to suggest, that I go through and organize them and come to the school once a week for a couple hours and sit and play librarian to anyone who is interested in checking out a book.  I’ll keep track of who takes them, etc.  Also, I figure this will help me meet the kids; I’ll try to pump them for info on if they want to start any clubs or tutoring or anything…and then I’ll make them pay me in Sekua terms/sentences J Nothing is for free folks…at least not while Boala is your volunteer.

I’ve also started communicating with a 5^th grade class in St. Louis. I signed up for World Wise Exchange, which is where I communicate with a class in the US about my experience here in the Peace Corps. So I’m gonna talk to the headmaster here in the village and see if we can get some student-to-student exchange going on.  Maybe some pics, letters, etc.

So…anyway. I am trying to think of ways to entertain myself and do some good in the community…I’m trying not to bitch too much without first looking at it from the village’s point of view.  I see that the villagers are busy trying to farm and do their other jobs and keep their houses and everything…it’s hard.  I understand that.  And I also am trying to think of how I need to change my way of thinking and my perceptions.  For example, just because I feel guilty because I’m not very busy, doesn’t mean that my village feels like I’m not doing anything…although I can’t ask them because they’d never tell me anything negative.  But, whatever. It’s a work in progress and I’m sure it will continue to have its ups and downs.

For Christmas, Chris and I are going to Accra and getting a nice hotel room with real beds and hot showers…fancy.  I wanna check out the Cultural Center while I’m there to see if it’s worth taking any of you guys to when you come to VISIT ME!!!!  I’ve heard it can be kinda overwhelming with pushy vendors…we’ll see.  I think we’ll also catch a movie, do small gift exchange, eat good food, etc.  Low key Christmas.  Sounds good to me.

So, I think that’s about all for me tonight. I’m sorry I haven’t been writing; I’ve been in a shitty mood and I don’t want you all to think I hate it here…because I don’t.  Am I homesick right now…yes…and that’s just how it is.  At some point something will start up and I’ll be all happy and excited again and then I’ll write all the good stuff….promise.

Thanks for listening…and please don’t start charging me for the therapy.

j

December 14, 2010

So I’ve been in a better mood this week…thank God!!!

We didn’t have our TMT meeting, again…I tried for 3 days to meet with the headmaster, hasn’t happened yet…and the water sachet ladies did not think practicing was very important… BUT

I did start making a protype for the headband/doo-rag combo that’s pretty cool.  The women all wanted mine that I took to work off of.  “No, this is mine.  I bought it with my own money.  I am learning how to make it, and once I learn, I will teach you.  Then you can make and sell them and then have money to buy your own!”  Confidence just came and talked to me about the batik project.  I told her I don’t want to involve an NGO to start because I don’t think our community is responsible with donated money, but I’ll match whatever she will put up in start up money. We’re thinking we’ll both put in 100 cedis of start up capital and then see how we fare for a few months. If it looks promising then we may contact an NGO to expand production.  So, we’ll see. 

 I hiked the mountain this morning with Rhoda (volunteer in next village); the Fulani (cattle herders) set the mountain on fire during dry season so new grass will come up for their cattle…makes the mountain look sad and crunchy L.  I took a walk earlier this week to take some pics of these really pretty trees that bloom at the cemetery, I also found a drum in HoHoe I’m gonna buy this week so I can start practicing drumming.  Soo…I’m trying to entertain myself in various ways even if it’s not actual work.

When I was walking down the footpath to the village this week a lady came from one of the houses (I always greet them, but I don’t know them) and asked me if I would “snap”  aka..take a picture.  I explained that I didn’t have my camera, but later in the week I’d come by and do it.  So Thursday I’m heading home from the village and I stop at her house…she tells me to go and come… (come later).  So anyway, I’m unpacking my stuff and there’s a knock at the door.  It is her with her little baby girl (3 mos old).  She is wanting me to take the baby’s picture; she has it in a cute lil’ outfit with a booties and a hat.  So I take a couple shots and then she goes, “So when will there be prints?” “Uh, well I don’t print in Ghana. I will send the snaps to my family in America and then they’ll send to me. So when I get them, I’ll bring them to you.” “Ok, so when you go there?”  “Where? America?” “Yes.” “Oh sister, you are not understanding me.  They will mail the prints to me.  It will be 2-3 months.” “Oh! The father is coming from Accra for Christmas. That is why I need the prints.” “Well, I don’t print in HoHoe.  So I don’t know how much it costs.”  And then she said something about money, which I hope meant she is planning on paying for the prints, but who knows. I hate not being able to communicate well.  I talked to my friend in HoHoe and he says I can get a digital print for 30 pesawa…not expensive, but I decided I will go to the house and tell the mom how much it costs and tell her to give me the money for the number of prints she wants and then I’ll have them printed when I’m in HoHoe.  Now you could be saying, “Boala, you heartless bitch, just give the woman the 30 pesawa!!”  But, if I do that, then the whole village will hear about it and every person will be after to me take pictures and print for them.  I hate that I cannot just be kind and giving here…at home I’d print the pics and hand them over without thinking about it.  But here, I have to gauge every move or else I end up screwed!!!  It’s exhausting.

Anyway.  I got my Christmas package from mom and dad…THANK YOU!!!  Yum, chocolate, and CHRISTMAS TREE CAKES!!!!! I love ‘em!  Christmas lights, singing santa, some leggings, deodorants, toothpaste, ton of food and a new silver chains so I can finally wear my necklace again!!!  Happy Day.

J

 December 16, 2010

I have some more updates, but I've actually been busy this week and will update next week. Just a fun note, this week I bought my new mattress.  15 people, 3 grown cows (with horns), and my new mattress all road home IN the tro...my mattress was bent in half on top the cows and 2 guys were sitting on my mattress...you get the picture.  I made home with no horn gouges in the mattress and now I don't get near as many bug bites!!!! :)

Tonight I'm going to the next village over; the secondary school is having Christmas caroling!! I'm excited!

Merry Christmas!

j